Long Road Ahead
by whumpqueen
Summary: Third installment in my Valor verse. Sam has a long way to go before he is back to who he was. He faces many struggles but with the help of Team one he can overcome them. Disclaimer: I do not own Flashpoint. Warning: Contains torture flashback scenes that may be too graphic for all audiences but I'm pretty sure they don't rate M.
1. Chapter 1

_All he could feel was intense pain. Worse pain then he had ever felt in his life. It was searing through his veins, burning his skin. He felt as if the sun itself had been thrust inside him. _

_He heard a distant voice asking questions he couldn't quite make out. _

_He felt the needle slide in his arm and fireworks went off behind his closed eyes as the pain grew. _

_A small gasp escaped his lips followed by mumbled words, when he realized the voice wanted to know what he had said he raised his head. He looked into the eyes of the voice and with a smirk defiantly declared, "Master Corporal Samuel Braddock, N85-63-8936." _

_A fist flew at his face, connecting with a solid thud. _

_As the last of his consciousness faded away Sam could feel soothing cold running through him from the antidote filled needle pressed into his skin._

x.X. Flashpoint .X.x

Sam woke with a gasp; his had tightly curled around the Ka-bar under his pillow. After thoroughly searching the room, he let the knife slip from his grasp as he sat on the end of the bed.

He looked over at his alarm clock and sighed when he saw that it read 3:25 in blinking red numbers. Sam slumped forward and ran a hand over his face; he hadn't been getting much sleep lately. He had been avoiding sleep for the most part, the nightmares were too real. He was afraid one of these days he would wake up and find that he was back _there_ and his escape and return home had been the dream.

In an attempt to push those thoughts from his mind, Sam decided to go for a run. He liked running at this time of day, there was no one around and the air was cool against his skin, soothing the heat he felt was ever present under the tanned flesh.

Sam quickly pulled on a pair of running shoes and a shirt to join his sweat pants and after checking his small apartment, took the stairs down to ground level and walked out into the cold night air.

Sam took off at a jog, scanning every dark alley before he neared it and occasionally glancing up to scan the rooftops. The sound of an approaching car had him reaching for the knife he had concealed in his waistband but the car passed quickly and Sam mentally told himself to relax.

As he reached the entrance to the park he heard the car backfire and practically dove for cover behind a large tree. As soon as the haze lifted on his mind he berated himself for acting like that and let his head fall back on the rough bark of the tree he was leaning on.

He let a soft curse pass his lips as he pushed himself forward and into an all-out sprint. He ran as fast and hard as he could, finally coming to a stop on the far side of the park he had been in. The slight burn in his lungs felt soothing, letting him know that this was real, he wasn't dreaming being back. He liked the feeling and turned and ran the entire way back to his apartment building and up the stairs. The burn had gone beyond pleasant now and he was practically gasping for breath but he liked feeling alive, feeling something. These days he felt so numb that the somewhat painful sensation was welcome as it was telling him he could at least feel something.

Sam cautiously entered his apartment and locked the door before checking every room and finally finding his way back to his bedroom to see the clock read 4:30. He sighed and decided he might as well get ready for work, even if he didn't have to go in until 7.

He stripped out of his sweat drenched clothing and went to the bathroom and turned on the shower. He sighed happily under the warm spray and closed his eyes for a moment.

When he opened them he frowned when he saw he was still holding the knife he had carried with him on his run. He didn't remember bringing it in with him and stepped out to set it next to the sink.

He caught sight of his reflection in the slightly fogged mirror and winced at the scars crisscrossing his body. His hand began tracing a few of the more noticeable ones but froze when they happened upon a particularly nasty one near his hip.

He wished he didn't remember how that had gotten there.

x.X. Flashpoint .X.x

_Sam's face contorted in pain as the knife bit into his skin. The man leaning over him smiled darkly at his discomfort. _

_The knife was suddenly thrust deeper before being removed completely. Sam was glad for the slight reprieve and hoped it would last a few seconds longer. _

_Then, as suddenly as the pain stopped, it began again only worse. Sam couldn't hold back the scream as he felt the hand roughly shoved into his wound and as it moved around, brushing against something inside of him._

x.X. Flashpoint .X.x

Sam reached forward and grabbed the edge of the counter to steady himself.

The flashback surprised him, he had never had one while he was awake before. God, he hoped that never happened again, he had to get this under control or he wouldn't make it through the day.

Sam couldn't understand it though, he had been home for two months now, and he should be getting better, not worse. Shaking his head to clear it Sam returned to the shower and quickly finished up and went to get dressed and make breakfast.

As he dressed and cooked he tried his best to get his rushing thoughts under control, he couldn't let them interfere with his job, that was the only thing keeping him together and he couldn't lose that. He didn't know if he could make it through the day without the SRU to escape to.

At the SRU he didn't have time to think of his problems, he did his job and saved lives, he followed orders, if he gave himself a second to worry about his own issues someone could get hurt and he wouldn't let that happen.

x.X. Flashpoint .X.x

A/N- so there is the next installment in my Valor verse. I have no personal experience with someone going through PTSD so if something is off don't get too mad. I would appreciate anything you could tell me to make it more realistic though, all my info is through online research so I would love if I could hear what it's really like. Send me a private message if you don't want everyone to see it. Oh and I also want to include a support group type thing in here so any info on how to portray that would also be greatly appreciated. Also as you may have noticed, I am including flashback torture scenes. They are expanding on what is shown in Missing In Action and will show things not portrayed in that fic. To clarify, the first flashback was a sort of drug torture type thing or something like snake venom. Anyways, hope you like it.


	2. Chapter 2

Ed entered the locker room to find Sam almost completely changed in to his workout gear. Ed glanced at his watch, he was early for shift and Sam had been earlier than him. Ed took a moment to take in Sam's appearance, he looked completely normal apart from the dark circles under his eyes the blank look on his face, as if he were hiding behind a mask.

Sam felt Ed's eyes on him and turned, offering a small nod in greeting. Ed wasn't surprised Sam knew he was there, hell the kid probably knew the moment he entered the building and that worried him.

As Ed changed into his own workout clothes he watched Sam leave the locker room, eyes darting around corners and behind lockers as if to discreetly check for anyone who may be hiding. That only served to worry Ed more. He could almost feel the soldier vibes rolling off of the young officer. Ed knew a good number of former soldiers, they had told him how coming back was the hardest part, you were expecting hostiles around every corner, diving for cover at the sound of fireworks, seeing the war in everyday life. One such man had told Ed that had he not finally gotten help, he would have ended up as one of Team One's hot calls. Ed didn't want to see that happen to his friend, to someone he looked on as family.

Spike's entrance broke him from his thoughts, "Damn Eddy, I was hoping I was the first in. I wanted to mess with Wordy's locker."

Ed smiled at Spike's antics, "Hate to break it to you but Sam was here even before me."

Spike's head snapped around to look at Ed as he opened his locker, "Samtastic is here?"

Ed watched as Spike looked around, searching for his friend, "Yeah, got here so early he's already in the workout room." Spike's eyebrow went up at Ed's words. Ed shrugged his shoulders at the younger man's concern, unsure how to ease them when his own were running wild.

"Who is already in the workout room?" Wordy asked as he walked in. Spike jumped in before Ed could reply, "Sam is."

Wordy's eyebrow went up, imitating Spike earlier expression, "That's the third time this week. I'm worried about him." Ed shot a surprised look over to Wordy; he hadn't known this was becoming a regular thing for the young man. "I've been reading up on PTSD," Wordy continued, "Sam is showing a few signs, hyper vigilance, irritability, and from the looks of it, trouble sleeping."

Ed contemplated Wordy's thoughts, "What do you mean irritability?"

Wordy was quite a moment as he pulled on his shirt, "He snapped at me a few days ago when I asked him about some of the equipment. He apologized after; he seemed just as surprised at his outburst as I did."

The room grew quite as the three SRU officers thought about their friend. They were soon all dressed and joined Sam in the gym. Ed wasn't surprised to see Sam going to town on the heavy bag, he was surprised though, at the way Sam seemed to almost throw the bag around. His attacks seemed effortless, powerful, practiced. Ed almost expected the bag to burst from the onslaught of blows.

Ed climbed on to a nearby treadmill that let him keep an eye on Sam, who seemed to grow more agitated with every punch.

Jules entered and Ed caught sight of the pamphlet she was holding and sighed, this wasn't going to end well.

"Sam, listen," Jules began, moving to stand near the bag Sam was working on. "I know you said that you're fine and all but you should take this." Jules held out the pamphlet and from where Ed was, he could see the letters 'PTSD' in bold white font.

Sam didn't even spare it a glance, "Don't need it Jules, I'm fine." Sam grunted out between blows.

Jules sighed in annoyance, "No you aren't Sam. You haven't been the same since you got back."

In a sudden burst of anger Sam threw a hard kick at the bag, the strain causing an already broken link in the chain holding up the bag to break, sending it into the wall. Everyone in the room froze, stunned at what had just happened. Sam, who it seemed hadn't even broken a sweat, turned to Jules. Anger flashed through his eyes briefly before he tucked it away behind his blank face, "I am fine Jules, I don't need all these crap pamphlets you keep shoving at me. The people that write those have no idea what they are talking about. But that doesn't matter, I don't need help, I'm perfectly fine."

With that, Sam stalked out of the room leaving the rest of Team One utterly stunned. Spike was the first to speak, "Did that really just happen?" At Wordy's nod, Spike ran over to inspect the bag lying limp against the wall.

As Spike investigated Wordy went to Jules and spoke with her in hushed tones, calming her down. Ed took the moment to slip out and search for Sam.

He found him eventually, hidden away and cleaning his rifle. Ed grabbed his own rifle from nearby and joined him. They sat silently cleaning their weapons before Sam paused and spoke, "I'm really sorry about that. I'm just sick and tired of everyone thinking I'm broken." Ed nodded but stayed silent. "I'm not broken." Ed wasn't sure which of them Sam was trying to convince.

Ed decided it was time to speak up, "Listen I can't even begin to comprehend what you went through, and I'm not going to try. But if there is one thing I know, it's that you can't be completely fine after something like that. I'm not saying you have to, but consider going to a support group or something. Somewhere that someone understands a bit better. Think about it, ok Sam. And I would apologize to Jules if I were you, she's a bit shaken." Before Sam could reply Winnie's voice announced a hot call. Sam and Ed rushed to get ready, both knowing the conversation wasn't quite over.

x.X. Flashpoint .X.x

A/N- so hope you like it. oh and I know the thing with the punching bag is totally unrealistic but I'm imagining it as a kind of freak adrenaline thing combined with an already busted link in the chain holding it so it kinda woks out that way. Next chapter is going to have the hot call in it. it should be exciting. The one after is going to have a surprise guest or two from "Missing In Action" but I'm not telling you who, you will have to read and find out.


	3. Chapter 3

"What have we got Winnie?" Greg asked as he climbed in the SUV.

"Bomb threat at Leaside High School, anonymous tipper called it in. The security guard on sight found a gym bag outside the main office; they are still checking the grounds for more." Spike smiled at Winnie's words, "Yeah bomb call!" Greg smiled at Spike's enthusiasm.

In a matter of minutes Team one was pulling up to the high school. "Spike, take Sam and go see what you can do about that bomb. Jules, I want you in the truck with me, we need to figure out who called this in and why someone would plant a bomb here. Wordy, Ed, help search the grounds and work on crowd control. Keep an eye out for anything suspicious, this guy might want to see his work in action." Greg threw out orders quickly.

Sam quickly followed Spike to the main office area with Babycakes in tow. As they made their way through the school, Jules was searching through the school's computers. "Boss, I got something." Jules voice crackled over the coms, "Looks like the school has been getting a steady stream of hate mail over their new Cadet Program. I'll see what I can do to find out who's behind it all."

Greg nodded, "Alright, what can you tell me about the program?"

Jules tapped a few keys, "Not much, it's relatively new, only a half dozen cadets so far. The website says it prepares students to join the military."

Sam broke in to the conversation, "Yeah, it's designed to teach students leadership and problem solving, make them into better soldiers. I met a few program graduates on one of the bases I was at, said it wasn't very popular amongst parents in some places. Guess they thought their kids should be thinking about school not war."

Jules contemplated what Sam said, "I'll look into parents first then, see what I can find."

Sam felt himself nod as he and Spike approached the gym bag. He watched as Spike slowly and carefully directed Babycakes to the bag, her, x-ray revealing a small explosive. Spike whistled, "Very sophisticated design doesn't seem to have much firepower behind it though, so either this is all just for show or this is the pre-show to the very explosive finale." Spike stepped forward, seeing that it was safe to open the bag and disarm the bomb.

As Spike directed Babycakes away and lowered the sides of the bag, Sam's eyes caught on something. He lunged forward and grabbed Spike, swinging him around the nearest corner as the bomb went off behind them.

Spike had been right, the blast wasn't very big but the sound of it went tearing through the nearby area, causing the members of Team One to pause, listening for any sounds coming from those nearest the bomb. "Spike, Sam! You guys alright? What's your condition?" Greg shouted into his headset.

After a brief moment of silence Spike coughed, "I'm fine Boss; Sam pulled me away from it in time."

Greg sighed, "What happened?"

Spike shook his head to clear it, "No idea, Sam must have seen something." Spike looked over to his friend, concerned at his silence. Sam was sitting down, holding his head tight as if he had a major headache. Spike leaned down next to him, "You alright Sam?"

x.X. Flashpoint .X.x

_Sam stared at the gruesome pictures in front of him. He tried to turn away but his captor clicked his tongue and drove another needle into his nail bed. Sam hissed at the sensation and reluctantly turned back to the pictures of the blackened corpses. _

_The man in front of him snarled, showing yellowed teeth, "These were your friends. One of them was a bomb expert wasn't he? Well, I think you will be pleased to know we stole the blueprints for the IED that killed him from one of your own military's bases. I'm sure he could have disarmed it given the chance, not that we gave him one. What was it that you called him? Specs, wasn't it?" _

_Sam growled, lurching forward, desperately trying to tear the throat out of the man in front of him who stood mocking his friend and fellow soldier. The man just laughed and nodded to another man who began blaring explosion sounds over the sound system at an unbearable level. _

_Sam sat there for hours, the sounds getting louder and more violent if his eyes drooped or he looked away from the pictures. _

_He gladly passed out when the sound finally quieted and a man came in to remove the needles from his fingertips._

x.X. Flashpoint .X.x

Sam gasped as he came back into his own head to hear Spike next to him, asking if he was alright. He managed to croak out, "I'm fine." He stood up, hand to his head, "Sound just gave me a killer headache is all."

Spike looked at him concerned, not quite believing the excuse. "What happened Sam? One minute the bomb is completely dormant, next, you are pulling me away and the thing goes up."

Sam straightened up, "Light sensor, I saw it when you opened the bag."

Spike looked shocked, "How the heck did I miss that? I didn't even see it."

Sam shook his head, "You wouldn't have known what it was if you did see it, that was high end military equipment."

Spike nodded his head in understanding before a question occurred to him, "How did you recognize it?"

Sam shrugged sheepishly, "One of the guys in my unit was a bomb expert, I had free time. He didn't mind showing off his blueprints and explaining everything to me."

Spike stood open mouthed, "Damn, Samtastic strikes again. You might know as much as I do about bombs if you were studying military specs." Spike didn't miss the way Sam's face fell as he said the last word but before he could ask anything Sam had his mask firmly back in place. It worried Spike how good Sam was at doing that.

"Boss," Sam broke the silence, "No way that tech wasn't stolen, you need to look into someone with a military background, preferably someone who still has access to stuff like that. And I wouldn't be surprised if Ed and Wordy find more bombs."

Spike nodded in agreement just as Wordy's voice came over the line, "We got two more devices; both seem to be the same as the one that just went off."

Spike thought for a moment, "It seems this guy just wants to make a statement. I'd have to see the others but if they are the same as this one, the guy wasn't looking to cause casualties, only panic."

Greg listened intently as Spike spoke, "If this guy is trying to make a statement he won't be pleased if we disarm the other bombs. We need to find this guy and stop him before he escalates." Everyone silently agreed with Greg, they knew if the guy escalated, people would get hurt.

Jules voice broke the radio silence, "Sarge, I got a lead. One of the students in the program, his father is part of a bomb disposal unit, just got back from a six month deployment. There was a domestic disturbance call to their house a week ago; apparently he didn't like his son getting involved with the military."

Greg's face grew grim, "Spike you think you can deal with the bombs now that you know what you're up against?"

Spike spoke confidently, "No problem, just need a dark room and some night vision and these bombs will be inactive before you can sneeze."

Greg smiled, "Good, cause I think Sam and I need to pay this guy a visit."

x.X. Flashpoint .X.x

A/N- so I know what I wrote about the Cadet Program isn't entirely accurate, but for the sake of the plot of this chapter I'm portraying it as similar to the American JROTC program. I just needed it to be attached to a high school. Also, I just had to get Babycakes in this fic, she hasn't shown up yet and I felt I was neglecting her as a character. Well, this hot call is taking longer to wrap up than I originally planned, so I'm splitting it up between two chapters, don't worry, Sam's friends will make an appearance soon enough.


	4. Chapter 4

Sam and Greg pulled up to the small house. Greg turned his com off and turned to Sam, "Are you ok to do this? If anything happens, you are going to be the one to get through to him."

Sam didn't hesitate, "I can do this Sarge."

Greg wasn't entirely convinced but a gunshot from the house stopped any further conversation. As they jumped from the vehicle, Greg turned his com on and yelled in to it, "As soon as you guys finish up at the school meet us at the suspect's house. We have an active shooter; I repeat there is an active shooter on the premises." A round of confirmations came over the line as the two officers ran to the backyard where the shot had come from.

As they rounded the corner they saw their suspect, Andrew Milnor, holding his wife and teenage son at gunpoint.

Sam approached the scene slowly, "Sir, this is the SRU, I'm going to need you to put the gun down." Sam's voice was firm, but Andrew shook his head in defiance of the order. "You don't understand, I can't let him go."

Greg took a step forward keeping his gun leveled at the shooter as Sam lowered his and stood safely behind him. "Can't let him go where?" Sam asked, trying to get more information.

Andrew shook his head frantically, "He wants to enlist, can't let him, he doesn't know."

Sam felt things click into place at Andrew's words, "That's why you placed the bombs in his school, you wanted to show him how dangerous it can be over there."

Andrew nodded, "He can't go, he doesn't understand."

Sam stepped slightly away from Greg, exposing himself but showing he meant no harm, "I get it."

Andrew's head snapped around to look at Sam, "You don't, you can't. You're too young. You don't know what it's like over there."

Sam smiled sadly, "I do know, Master Corporal Samuel Braddock, N85-63-8936." Sam cringed slightly as he finished speaking.

Andrew's face grew sad, "Sir, you sound like you have said that one too many times."

Sam's face changed, seeming oddly blank before he let his profound sadness show through, "I'm afraid you're right Corporal."

Andrew nodded in agreement, "Then you see why I can't let him go. I can still hear the screams; I don't want him to have to hear them too."

Sam took a step forward, "Your war won't be his." At Andrew's reluctant nod Sam continued, "What was your war soldier?"

The yard was quiet for a moment, the only sound was the crunch of gravel as the rest of Team One arrived and made their way around back. "We were supposed to clear the building of IEDs; we thought we had them all. It was such a small school. They sent the children in; we were just driving off as it went off. Took out half the building, I'd never seen a blast that big. They were just children." Andrew sobbed on the last line, his gun lowering.

Jules and Wordy took the opportunity to grab the two hostages and lead them away.

Andrew looked down at the gun in his hand and Sam could see where it was leading, "Corporal, I'm going to need you to stand down."

Andrew looked up, tears in his eyes, "I don't think I can sir."

Sam took a step forward, ignoring Ed's warning to stay put. "You can make it through this soldier; you just need a little help." Andrew's eyes flashed momentarily with anger but Sam continued, "I was part of a Black Ops unit, four of us were captured after we watched more of our unit die in front of us. We were held for six months, one of us didn't make it. But the rest of us, we got out, but we didn't come out whole. I know you think you don't need help, that you can keep the flashbacks under control. That maybe you won't jump out of your skin the next time your wife drops a pan. You won't get so angry when your son leaves clothes everywhere or the next door neighbor's dog barks at two in the morning. You think you can sleep without nightmares, that you won't always have to do perimeter checks every night or check for snipers on your morning run. I know, because I think the same things." Sam is standing only a few feet away from Andrew, holding his hand out for the gun, "If you give me the gun, you can find someone to help you with that, we both can."

Andrew looks in to Sam's eyes, surprised by the honesty reflected in them. Andrew nods "I think I heard about your unit, they talk about you guys a lot over there. You guys are heroes to us, I guess if you need help after what you went through, it's not so bad if I do too." He grows quiet and allows Sam to take the gun from his trembling hand.

Ed is suddenly behind him, cuffing him as Sam steps back towards Greg. Greg places a hand on the young constable's shoulder, "That took a lot of guts to admit." Greg turns him slightly and looks him in the eye, "Are you ok Sam?"

Sam doesn't trust his voice and simply shakes his head, desperately trying to hold back tears. Greg waits until Ed leads Andrew around to the front and brings Sam into a hug, allowing the younger man to lay his head on his shoulder. Greg doesn't even realize Sam is crying until he feels a tear fall on his neck. Greg wraps his arm tighter around Sam.

After a while Sam pulls away, his face slightly red with embarrassment. Greg is surprised how young Sam looks with his guard down. He allows Sam a moment to collect himself before Greg steers him around to the front where the rest of Team One is anxiously waiting. Greg knows they all heard what Sam said and wonders how they will react.

He doesn't have to wait long as Spike immediately launches himself at Sam, desperate to comfort his best friend. After Spike finally extricates himself from Sam, Jules gives him a gentle hug and a swift peck on the cheek. Wordy simply lays a comforting hand on Sam's shoulder as Ed talks to him softly. "I go to this group occasionally, former cops and soldiers. We talk about things, I think it might be good for you; you should come with me next week. It's just like Andrew said, it's not bad if you need a little help after what you went through."

Sam nodded, "I'll come." Sam turned to the rest of the team, "There are some guys I want you all to meet, would you mind coming with me after we are done for the day?"

Wordy gently squeezed Sam's shoulder, "No problem Sam, I'm in." Everyone replied in much the same manner, eager to help Sam however they could.

x.X. Flashpoint .X.x

A/N- This guy is ranked as a Corporal, I don't know if that's a realistic rank for someone in bomb disposal but I wanted Sam to out rank him and Corporal seem better than Private. Don't worry, it's not over yet. It is going faster than I thought it would though and I'm not really ready to retire my OC's so I hope you don't mind if I put another story in the works, hopefully it's another long one with lots and lots of special guest OC appearances and more BAMF! Sam.


	5. Chapter 5

The door opened to reveal a tall man with black hair falling past his ears. Sam's smile brightened, "Gray!"

Gray embraced Sam in a quick hug before turning to see his numerous companions. Gray's eyebrow rose, "Bringing me more Braddock?"

Sam smirked, "Nah, these guys are just here with me to meet the boys." Sam turned to the members of Team One, "This is Sargent Robert Gray, and he runs this place. He take in veterans having a hard time re-integrating, helps them get back on their feet and deal with the challenges of coming back."

Gray smiles and nods in greeting, "Tried to get Sam to stay with me a while, got pretty pissed at me if I remember correctly. But no matter, he brought me a couple guys and somehow convinced the higher ups to fund this place."

Sam looked away sheepishly, "Sorry about that Gray, guess I wasn't ready to admit I'm just as messed up as the rest of the guys you got hidden away up here."

Gray smiled, "Looks like someone got through that thick skull of yours. Anyways, your boys are out back with Bishop, Doug and Camp." Gray waved his hand, motioning for the team to follow him. He led them through a moderately sized house, to a large back yard where several guys were working on building a shed.

A guy with unruly red hair was the first to spot Sam, "Rambo!" Sam's cheeks tinted red as the team gave him questioning looks. The man ran over and lifted Sam off the ground in a hug, "Where have you been man? It's been weeks since we saw you. Well, you're here now and you brought friends. Damn, wish I knew you were coming, I could have rigged a couple confetti blasters, maybe come up with something a little more interesting."

The team stood staring open mouthed until Wordy mumbled, "Oh dear Lord, there's two of them."

Ed laughed and turned to Spike, "Why didn't you tell us you had a fraternal twin?" That had the rest of them laughing.

Sam put an arm around the man's shoulders, "This is Andrew McCarthy, Red to the guys in our unit. Speaking of which, where's Shift?" Sam turned to look at Red who gave Sam a 'no duh' look and pointed to the garage, "Under the hood, where else?"

Sam smiled and dragged Red over to the small garage with the team not far behind. Sam reached out and banged on the side of a beat up car, causing the man working on it to shoot out from under the hood. "Sammy, hey what brings you here."

Sam motioned to the group, "Wanted you guys to meet some people."

Shift smiled and grabbed a rag to wipe his hands off on, "Hi, names Christopher Blackwell, but everyone calls me Shift."

Sam motioned between the two soldiers and the rest, "Red, Shift, I would like you to meet Greg, Ed, Wordy, Spike and Jules."

Red turned to Spike, "Spike huh? Where did that one come from?"

Spike smiled, "Same as you I'm guessing, I used to spike my hair."

Red's face broke into a big smile as he turned to face Sam, "I like him." Sam laughed and he heard Wordy and Ed groan dramatically.

Another man limped up, leaning heavily on a cane, "Hey sorry to break this up but Sarge wants Sam here on KP. Says 'he brought all the people so he gets to cook'."

Sam turned towards the house when he heard a groan from behind him. He turned, trying to identify the source, "I'm not that bad of a cook."

Red bounded up next to him and swung an arm over his shoulder, "Yeah the things this guy can do with an MRE."

Shift laughs at his friends' antics, "I think we all know Sam couldn't cook anything edible to save his life, it's about the only thing he can't do. We had better help if we want to actually eat."

Ed smiled, "Really now, the only thing you can't do. You holding out on us Rambo?"

Sam ducked his head laughing and Red perked up, "Seriously, took me more than a year to come up with that one. Sammy- boy is hard to nickname, got too many skills."

Spike threw his hands up in the air in mock exasperation, "Don't I know it. That's why I stick with the tried and true, Samtastic."

Red pointed a finger at Spike, "So that was you. He told us about that, you are a tough act to follow my friend."

Shift groaned, "Great Red found a friend, this could be potentially disastrous."

Wordy sidled up next to Shift and stage whispered, "If we run now, we might make it out with our bodies and minds intact."

Both Spike and Red turned in indignation with a simultaneous, "Hey!" as everyone runs off to help make lunch.

x.X. Flashpoint .X.x

As Sam walked to the car, Ed walked up beside him, "Nice guys, we could use them in the SRU if they are interested."

Sam smiled, "I'll let them know, but I don't think the building could take it if Spike and Red teamed up."

Ed laughed, "Yeah, they are a bit too alike. That must have difficult at first."

Sam's face fell slightly, understanding what Ed meant, "It was tough, I kept thinking he was Spike and it made me miss you guys but at the time, I couldn't handle things here. I needed to get away. After a while, I was glad they are so similar, it reminded me what I needed to get back to."

Ed smiled, "Glad to hear it, and remember, the support group meets tomorrow night. I had better see you there."

Sam nodded and headed off to his car as the rest of Team One went their separate ways.

x.X. Flashpoint .X.x

A/N- so I kinda snagged a bunch of characters from Season 5 Episode 8 "We take care of our own" but they never robbed the armored truck, instead Red and Shift ended up there and Sam convinced his dad to get the military to donate money to the group. But yeah, I may go over how that happened in another story. So yeah, I just really liked the idea of it and it seemed better than putting one of the guys in a psychiatric facility. Oh and if you want, you can send me a prompt for this verse and I'll write it. I like these characters too much to stop writing them. Not quite done with this story, wanted a little fun before it got serious, next chapter Sam is going with Ed to the support group.


	6. Chapter 6

Sam walked in and immediately spotted Ed. He walked over to the older man, who smiled and patted him on the back before motioning to the chair beside him. The chairs were arranged in a circle and Sam took a moment to look around at those attending. It wasn't hard to tell he was the youngest one there, most of the guys there were retired cops or military personnel, Sam was neither.

As Sam scanned the faces he noticed an older gentleman making his way over to him. The man smiled, "Never seen you here before. My name is Josiah, what's yours."

Sam stood and shook the man's outstretched hand, "Sam, nice to meet you Josiah. This is my first meeting, not quite sure what to expect."

Josiah nodded his head in understanding, "It's not much, we just talk a bit. So how did you hear about our little group?"

Sam motioned to Ed, "I work with Ed, and he thought I should come."

Josiah's face took on a confused look, "Son, I don't mean to be rude but if I remember correctly from what Ed has said in the past, you've only been with the force a couple years. Not many guys come across something traumatic enough to send them here in that little time."

Sam smiled sadly, "I wish it was that simple, before the SRU I was with JTF2 and I recently came back from a sixteen month tour in a Black Ops unit."

Josiah whistled in amazement, "Well that certainly explains why a young kid like you shows up at one of these things. Well I hope we can help. If you ever need someone to talk to, I'm available, but right now I have to get this meeting started." Josiah turned and took a seat at the head of the circle; everyone else quickly took their seats.

Josiah was quiet for a moment, looking over the group, "I know most of you have noticed, we have a new member in our ranks. Since it's his first time, I just wanted to say, this group is here to help. No one is required to share, but we can't help you if you stay silent. We all give our support and advice to everyone here and what is said here stays here. We will respect each other's boundaries whether they are personal or professional. Now, with that said, who would like to start us off tonight?"

A man looking to be in his fifties nods to Josiah and begins his story. Sam listens to the ex-cop's story, how an old case of his is haunting his nightmares. The man talks about how a child was brutally murdered by his parents, how he thinks he could have, should have, stopped it. Sam watches as others lend their support; tell him how they got through those cases.

Sam sits through several more stories; he can feel Josiah's eyes on him. Josiah glances at his watch as the most recent round of advice comes to an end, "We have time for one more person, and if you all don't mind I would like to give our newest member the chance to speak, if he wants to."

Sam is quiet for a moment and he feels Ed's hand land on his shoulder in a supportive gesture. Sam allows himself to collect his thoughts before speaking, "Well, this is my first time, and I'm not quite sure what to say. My name is Sam; I'm currently with Team One of the SRU. Before that I spent a few years in JTF2. A little over a year and a half ago, we had a call to the Godwin Coliseum. The guy had just come back from a tour where he lost a lot of friends. He wanted to go to the one place things made sense but they were tearing it down. I couldn't get through to him and he died, so I decided to do what he did, go back to where things made sense. I went back to the military and ended up on a Black Ops unit. Things went really bad while we were over there. When things cleared up, I knew I had to come back, but I feel like I can't switch anything off. I jump at car backfires; I map out escape routes when I enter a room. The nightmares keep getting worse and I can't keep my mind in the present during the day. I feel like I should be holding it together better than this, that I should be stronger. The other guys in my unit seem to be and I feel like I'm letting them down by not being as strong as they are." Sam looks down, embarrassed he had let so much slip out, but once he started talking he couldn't seem to stop.

One of the older guys, who Sam remembers is retired Army, leans forward, "Son, I have no idea what you went through over there, maybe you'll get around to telling that story at one of these things but I can guarantee you one thing, you are in no way weaker than the men you served with. In my opinion you are stronger than most of us in this room, you have to be in order to say what you said tonight. It takes a stronger man to admit he needs help than to hide it."

Ed nods in agreement and squeezes Sam's shoulder, "Sam, you know you aren't alone in this. Most of us here have felt what you are feeling or have done the same things."

Josiah speaks up at Ed's words, "I suffered from PTSD for years before my wife got me to see someone. Admittedly my case seemed to have escalated slower than yours but I can tell you, just coming here on a regular basis will help. Having somewhere safe where you can talk about your struggles and what happened to you, it puts your mind at ease, gets some of the little stuff off your chest. You are already on the way to making things right, but I would suggest a personal confidant, someone you tell everything to, who can keep you accountable and help you through any episodes you have."

Sam felt himself nod as he thought about someone he could talk to. He barely held back a smile when he realized who it had to be.

When the meeting concluded and Sam had spoken with a few members, who offered encouragement, Sam said goodbye to Ed and Josiah. As soon as he was outside he pulled out his phone. Sam dialed quickly and waited for the voice on the other end. When he heard a gruff 'hello' Sam smiled, "Hey Rocky, you got time to talk?"

x.X. Flashpoint .X.x

A/N- Hope you enjoyed the story. I'm ending this one here but there will be more in this series, they just won't focus on Sam's PTSD. So I have no idea how accurate the material in this chapter is, I couldn't find any information on what goes on in a veterans support group so it's mostly guess work. Also, wanted to say, it's snowing like crazy here so I might be able to get to work on my next story this weekend.

bettsam0731, love the idea, and Rocky will definitely show up in the next story, he's my favorite; shh don't tell my other OC's.


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